the day i find zero delight in talking to you. it is so damn rare to never get bored of someone; and i know from the experience of having that someone. errrr..

for now, see ya

now, ‘eliminating the unnecessary’ was always a task needed to be fulfilled within months of its beginning. my circle is too large, too consuming, too unfamiliar when it shouldn’t be.

do you know how easy it is to cut all the excess and have them slip out of favour? as easy as forgetting the dates that used to mean so much to you. you just get absorbed into other things and you realize your prior jewels weren’t nearly as eye-opening as the ones you were just introduced to. i’m not done until i’ve been exposed to a solid third of all the mines, continually being turned inside out.

i am for the bodies that move, speak, think—my dad’s belly, my mom’s voice, my grandma’s old photos. i don’t know what else to do with tissues of your amending heart but to hold them; and maybe these three pages stuffed in this dirty envelope will straighten things out. hey, check my credentials: i am disheartening, sarcastic, annoying. don’t stay.

my hands are somehow being held by all of you, all at once; but ultimately, my stars will die and i will be stopped from trying to save my world. i still deal with the 4am natural spirits filling my room to raise the laughs that drone out of my mouth while simultaneously feeling angry at knowing i gotta share you. i wish my bones were colder so i could be past the feeling, ya know?

i used to think it was really cool how i could get up, drink too much whatever, spend too much time reading every tedious word on the internet, and drain my brain with loving you too much.